Monday, January 7, 2013

Just let me peel the protective cellophane coating off of this brand new 'Blog' thing, and I'll explain the title, 'A Different Cloth'. Alright, all done. Here we go...

The Oxford Dictionary definition of the word 'Author' is 'the writer of a book, article, or document. So I guess considering the reputable source of that definition, I am an 'Author'. Although that title still seems weird to me, even now people will ask, 'So, you're an Author?' and my response is, 'I wrote a book and published it, so Yes?''

But right around the time I was ready to publish I thought it to be a good idea to get to know other writers/ authors, since I was now one of 'them', (By Oxford Dictionary definitions, anyway.) But as time went on and I ventured out into this new...um, venture and got to know these people, something quickly became quite apparent...other then writing something and having it published (Sometimes, some writers are far too pefectionalistic to actually take the plunge.), I had absolutley NOTHING in common with them. I apologize in advance if the following 'criteria' doesn't apply to you as an Author/Writer. (If it doesn't, pleeeeease get in touch with me, I'd love to meet you!)

Again, this goes for the ones I've actually met and spoken to, not EVERYONE.

Degrees and Certificates for English, Creative Writing and the like. Yeah, great, you went to school and paid money to learn how to write, congratulations. You now have a piece of paper reaffirming  your ability to construct a cohesive sentence. By the way, the general public remains decidedly unimpressed.
I don't have any degrees or pieces of paper to tell me that I'm 'allowed to write'. And the sad truth is most authors will look down their noses at it, as if to say, 'Why are YOU here?', because without that piece of paper, you are unworthy of note and not 'the real deal'. I LOATHE that 'elitist' crap, but it's going to be a recurring theme, so get used to it.
I am of the frame of mind that creative ability of ANY of the Arts should come naturally, taking classes to learn the basics is one thing, but if you need further instruction past that point, then perhaps trying something else will suit you better. You cannot learn to be creative, no matter how many pieces of paper tell you otherwise.

A lot of Authors also seem to be big on the 'Wine Tasting', fancy cheese nibbling, high society, hoity toity scene. I, for one am not. Again, this is another example of the 'elitist' frame of mind that most Authors have. And again, if this does not apply to you, carry on.
Just the smell of wine gives me a headache, if I'm going to enjoy an adult beverage, I'm going to damn well drink it, not just taste it. It's also going to a beer, in a bottle (Never in a glass.) and as for cheese, slap it on a burger and we'll call it good. I'm also not much of a 'social butterfly', being around a group of people too long is 'uncomfortable' to me. Now I realize that most Authors are social shut-ins, but the ones that aren't take it to an extreme. I even know another local Author who does book signings at these little soirees (and charges people to attend!), sorry, but that's not my target demographic. If they happen to stumble across my work and enjoy it, awesome, but I'm not going to go out of my way to garner favour from them.

Then there's the whole 'all Authors must read, read, read!' Even the King himself is a staunch believer is this idea. Will reading more make you a better writer? Will it help you discover your own style? I don't see how this can possibly work without absorbing a little something from them, thus, not making it your own. This is why I don't read much, I don't want to be influenced and 'accidently' 'borrow' somebody elses style or ideas. But it can still happen even when you try and avoid it...
Many of them wear their 'well read-ness' like a badge of honor, and if you've never read Melville, Shakespeare, Steinbeck and their ilk, you are a less than human scabbrous leper not worthy to stand amongst them! How DARE you call yourself an Author without reading the Masters of the craft??? I was once given the 'ol 'stinkeye' for saying that I never read Tolkien. I tried once after the movies came out and gave it a go, I quietly put it down after 30+ pages of Bilbo walking through the woods. Sorry, but that shit was boring. I appreciate what Tolkien has accomplished in making the Fantasy genre loved and accepted, but still...major boring shit. Not reading it.

All that said, I'm not trying to say that I'm better than other Authors because I don't 'adhere' to the typical stereotype, I'm just 'different', and that's okay. Am I better than SOME? Not for me to say, but I have readers that enjoy my works, and some very favourable reviews that would lean to a firm 'Not too shabby, new guy.' Am I less than great compared to others? Of course! I'd be a major douche-canoe to think otherwise.
And if you need to decide for yourself, please check out my stuff for yourself, look me up on Amazon.com for my selections, you can get them all for about $5. If ya dig 'em, cool, mission accomplished! And if ya don't, that's cool too.

And taking everything stated previously to heart, this is why I remain cut from...
A Different Cloth.

2 comments:

  1. What are you - my doppelganger??? Other than the beer - I don't actually drink - just don't like the flavour - so change the beer to Diet Coke and we're cool.
    Fantastic blog post.

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  2. I facebook shared, tweeted and google+ this.

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